I can’t believe it’s all done. In the past like a dream you don’t want to end yet seven days later, I’m still feeling pumped from attending my first Second Pride event. To say that I miss it might be understating a little as I long for more. Somebody give me more.
How did I not not know of Second Pride until shortly after last year’s event?
I invested far too much of my life living in giving in to those whose whole meaning in life to oppress others. They aren’t good people at all and yet we are expected to kneel to them in submissiveness. I’m not playing down why I became like this and why I feared having anything to do with anyone like myself but I can’t but wish I had done what some tried to encourage me to do and just go.
The past few years has been driving my insane with living my pretend life which nobody believed anyway. Those who I hid it from knew because I suck at hiding my sexuality. Like my friend who told me that I should stop hiding when everybody notices how I respond to a woman who catches my attention, whether I know what I am doing or not.
This isn’t a post about sadness but joy. It’s a huge thank you to everyone of you at Second Pride. Not just those on the Pride Committee, their sponsors and volunteers. It is to all of you including those of you who came to support and those who came to party. The camaraderie was amazing.
My original intention was to help by blogging for Second Pride and turning up once or twice but no, I was there every single day. Each day seeing my attendance taking up more hours in the day where on the final was my ultimate for never leaving but for the enforced absence by a crashed viewer and that was only five to ten minutes.
You opened my heart and filled it with rainbow. I could not list the names of every amazing person I met at Second Pride to who I am eternally grateful. There are so many of you. I hid among ‘mainstream society’ for far too long and all of you helped take that extra step beyond the major steps I have taken in the past year such as moving in with my very real girlfriend whose family still feels surreal to me with their level of acceptance and humanist belief systems.
I sit here writing this, listening to Boy George’s beautiful voice playing in my ears as I tear up just as I did in closing moments of 2017’s Second Pride as it filled me with what I needed all those year ago. All of you are some of the beautiful people I have met in my life. I lived in secret and I lived out there at the same time. That’s how useless I am at hiding who I am.
People like Kahvy, LLedge, Viktor, Bock, Evan and who could leave out beautiful women like Belle and so sooo many others of you. Thank you.
There are those before Second Pride who played a role. Especially Jenny who despite our ups and downs, will always be important to me and who I will always love intensely.
I found being there in the midst of celebration was healing. As healing as drawing energy of the full moon. Bring on 2018 Second Pride for I cannot wait.
All of you inspired me to attempt recording parts of the final day of Second Pride to make a video which, after all the cuts an digital tape left in megabits of mess all over the editing floor, I put together this ten minute video which I hope you enjoy. I have tried to present Second Pride as it felt to me.
♥ Love you all. ♥
Cafe Sheree Landmark